The Colorado Counseling Podcast

Welcome to the Colorado Counseling Podcast with your host, Jenny. This episode invites you to release negativity and create space for peace through a guided meditation for clearing negative energy. Life's stresses and challenges can build up, leaving us feeling heavy and unsettled. Join Jenny as she leads you through a calming meditation designed to help you let go of tension, ease your mind, and welcome positivity into your life. If you’re seeking a fresh start or a moment of calm, then this practice is here to guide you toward inner peace and renewal. Take a deep breath, and let's begin.

 
Let's chat about a topic that affects many, yet is often misunderstood: Manipulation.
We'll unpack what manipulation really is, how it operates in relationships, and its psychological aspects.
Manipulation is more than just exerting influence over others. It involves harmful tactics aimed at controlling another person's behavior, thoughts, or emotions, often to serve one's personal aims.
From subtle emotional exploitation to outright mental distortion, manipulation can take many forms and can significantly impact a person's well-being.
A particular focus of our discussion will be on narcissistic manipulation. Narcissists are often skilled manipulators, using various strategies to assert power and control.
We'll explore how narcissists manipulate their victims, providing insights to help you identify and navigate such situations.
We'll also discuss a common tool in the manipulator's arsenal - the emotionally manipulative apology.
Such apologies may seem sincere on the surface but are often designed to evade responsibility and maintain control.
Recognizing these apologies is key to protecting oneself from further manipulation.
So stay tuned as we talk about the world of manipulation, aiming to arm you with knowledge and tools to safeguard your emotional health and relationships.
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Manipulation is a powerful and often harmful tool used to control or influence others for personal gain. It involves tactics that exploit vulnerabilities, emotions, or trust, making it a deceptive and unethical behavior.
Manipulation can take many forms, ranging from emotional abuse in close relationships to social influence tactics in professional or public settings. Understanding manipulation and learning how to respond to it can help protect your mental well-being and foster healthier interactions.
Defining Manipulation and Its Impact
At its core, manipulation is a strategy for exerting control over someone by influencing their thoughts, feelings, or actions. Often subtle, these tactics distort the other person's reality to serve the manipulator's own needs. Manipulation can leave the victim feeling guilty, confused, or drained, as it undermines their self-confidence and challenges their ability to trust their own perceptions.
Manipulative behavior is prevalent in many aspects of life, from intimate relationships to workplace dynamics. Manipulative people often use guilt trips, passive-aggressive behavior, or silent treatment as tools to coerce others into compliance.
This not only creates emotional distress but can also lead to strained relationships and long-term mental health issues, such as anxiety or low self-esteem.
Common Types of Manipulation
1. Emotional Manipulation
This form targets emotions to achieve control. Emotional manipulators often induce feelings like guilt or fear to sway others. For example, someone might say, "If you really cared about me, you’d do what I ask." These guilt-inducing statements are a hallmark of emotional abuse and can chip away at self-confidence.
2. Love Bombing
A common manipulation tactic in the early stages of relationships, love bombing involves excessive attention, flattery, and affection to create a sense of dependency. Though this behavior might seem positive initially, it often serves the manipulator's goal of exerting control over their partner.
3. Passive-Aggressive Behavior
Passive aggression includes indirect expressions of hostility, such as sarcastic remarks, subtle insults, or cruel humor. This approach allows the manipulator to avoid direct confrontation while still exerting influence.
4. Gaslighting
A psychological tool, gaslighting creates confusion by causing the victim to doubt their own memory or perception of reality. For instance, a manipulative partner may deny past statements or actions, leaving the other person questioning their own recollection.
5. Guilt Trips and Silent Treatment
Both guilt trips and silent treatment are common manipulation tactics used to make someone feel responsible for the manipulator's feelings or actions. These methods can leave the victim emotionally paralyzed, unsure of how to proceed.
Recognizing Manipulative Behavior
Identifying manipulation in relationships often requires careful observation. Signs of emotional manipulation may include feeling guilty or second-guessing your decisions after interactions with a certain person. Manipulative individuals may use exaggerated praise, twist facts to suit themselves, or exploit trust to achieve their own benefit.
If you find yourself frequently doubting your own feelings, feeling blamed for things outside your control, or tolerating unfair treatment, you may be dealing with a manipulative relationship. It's important to recognize red flags and take the necessary steps to protect your mental well-being.
Strategies for Dealing with Manipulation
1. Set Healthy Boundaries
Clearly communicate your limits to manipulative people and stand firm in upholding them. For instance, if a manipulative partner attempts to exert control through guilt trips, calmly state that you won’t tolerate such behavior moving forward.
2. Maintain Self-Confidence
Manipulators often target those with low self-esteem, using their insecurities to exert control. Building self-confidence and trusting your instincts can help you counter these tactics. This might include developing self-compassion and practicing positive self-talk.
3. Respond with Honest and Direct Conversation
Manipulation thrives in ambiguity. Having honest and direct conversations can disrupt a manipulative person’s control. Use "I" statements to express how their behavior affects you without blaming. For example, say, "I feel disrespected when my opinions are dismissed."
4. Delay Your Responses
Manipulative individuals often pressure others into quick decisions for their own advantage. Delaying your response gives you time to assess the situation and ensure your choices align with your own needs and values, rather than theirs.
5. Seek Professional Support
If you're dealing with a chronically manipulative person or feel overwhelmed by the challenges of handling manipulation, seeking professional support is key. A mental health professional or trained advocate can help you establish firm boundaries, regain emotional strength, and develop strategies to manage manipulation effectively.
6. Know When to Walk Away
Some situations, especially those involving emotional abuse or narcissistic personality disorder, require creating physical or emotional distance. If manipulation in relationships—be it with a family member or a manipulative partner—continues to harm your mental health, it’s okay to step away for your own well-being.
7. Tap into Your Support System
Rely on trusted friends, family members, or professional resources such as the National Domestic Violence Hotline. These connections can provide the validation, assistance, and strength you need when dealing with manipulation in relationships.
The Importance of Emotional Intelligence
Trait emotional intelligence is essential for recognizing manipulation and responding assertively. Emotional intelligence allows you to understand your emotions and those of others while maintaining control over your responses. Developing this skill can help you identify emotional manipulators more easily and protect yourself from their tactics.
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Manipulation may appear in various forms, but the impact it leaves is universally damaging. By learning to recognize signs of emotional manipulation and setting firm boundaries, you can take the first steps toward regaining control. Remember, tolerating manipulation is not your responsibility, and your mental well-being should always take precedence.
Equipped with self-awareness and the right strategies, you can foster healthier relationships and build a life where your needs and boundaries are respected. If you need extra support, reach out to a mental health professional who can guide you on the path to self-respect and resilience.
The power to overcome manipulation lies within you. Trust yourself, set limits, and take action to create a life grounded in honesty, respect, and emotional well-being.
 

In the latest episode of the Colorado Counseling Podcast, brought to you by Overcomers Counseling, we get into a topic that's not often discussed but affects many women around the world - Tokophobia: The Severe Fear of Pregnancy.
Tokophobia is more than just a fear; it's a pathological dread of pregnancy that can lead to avoidance of childbirth. This condition can be classified as primary or secondary, and it's estimated to affect around 10% of women worldwide.
Throughout our discussion, we aim to shed light on this debilitating fear, exploring its symptoms, causes, and potential treatments. We discuss why tokophobia isn't talked about as much as it should be, despite causing severe psychological distress and having far-reaching consequences.
https://overcomewithus.com/relationships/parenting-counseling
 
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Overcoming Tokophobia
If you or someone you know is struggling with this intense fear, you’re not alone. We’re here to break down what Tokophobia is, its symptoms, causes, and how you can overcome it for a healthier, more positive experience.
 
What is Tokophobia?
Tokophobia is a pathological fear of pregnancy and childbirth. Unlike general anxiety that many women feel as they approach labor, Tokophobia involves extreme fear or dread that can interfere with everyday life. It goes beyond nervousness—it’s an overwhelming and paralyzing fear of giving birth that can lead to women avoiding pregnancy entirely or requesting elective cesarean sections to sidestep vaginal birth.
This fear has a worldwide prevalence and can negatively affect pregnant women’s lives, relationships, and mental health. Whether the anxiety stems from a past history of trauma, the anticipation of labor pain, or imagined childbirth risks, dealing with Tokophobia requires compassion, understanding, and often professional intervention.
 
Causes of Tokophobia
Tokophobia can result from a wide variety of factors, many of which are deeply personal. Some of the most common causes include:
Previous Traumatic Events - For women who have experienced sexual abuse, traumatic childbirth, or distressing medical interactions, the prospect of giving birth can reignite buried fears.
Hearing Stories - Many women develop Tokophobia just by hearing frightening or exaggerated stories about labor and delivery.
General Anxiety or Psychiatric Disorders - Underlying anxiety disorders, depression, or post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) can increase a woman’s vulnerability to Tokophobia.
Young Age and Lack of Support - Younger women and those with little or no social support—such as a partner, family member, or trusted friend—may feel overwhelm and fear when faced with the realities of pregnancy and childbirth.
For some, the fear is heightened by medical or family factors, such as a family history of mental health conditions or prior complications during pregnancy.
 
Types and Symptoms of Tokophobia
Tokophobia manifests in two forms.
Primary Tokophobia occurs in women who have never given birth. Pregnant women identified with this fear may have heard distressing stories about labor or developed a strong fear of childbirth at a young age. They may even avoid pregnancy entirely despite wanting children.
Secondary Tokophobia occurs in parous women—those who have already given birth. Often tied to traumatic childbirth experiences, it can develop after severe complications, pain, or emotional distress during labor.
 
Tokophobia symptoms can include.
Severe anxiety and panic attacks when thinking about childbirth.
An avoidance of pregnancy or sexual activity due to the fear of conception.
Persistent intense fear of labor or a refusal to plan for vaginal delivery.
Other symptoms of mental health conditions, such as insomnia, fatigue, or the need to control every aspect of the pregnancy.
Requests for medical interventions, such as elective cesareans, even when medically unnecessary.
It’s essential to differentiate normal childbirth apprehension from Tokophobia. While it’s natural to feel some concern about pregnancy and childbirth, women battling Tokophobia experience an overwhelming fear that negatively affects their emotional and physical well-being.
 
The Impacts of Tokophobia
Tokophobia can ripple through every aspect of a woman’s life.
Mental Health - Women may develop postpartum depression, severe anxiety, or other mental health conditions as a result of their significant fear.
Relationships - Couples may experience strain due to a woman’s avoidance of sexual intercourse or disagreements over family planning.
Physical Health - Prolonged anxiety can lead to stress-induced health issues, such as chronic fatigue or difficulty maintaining a healthy pregnancy.
Family Dynamics - Fear of childbirth often leads to distressing internal conflicts for women and their loved ones. A lack of understanding from family and friends can exacerbate feelings of isolation and make it harder to seek support.
Tokophobia is not something women can “just get over.” It’s a deeply rooted fear that requires compassion, validation, and a committed effort to address its causes and effects.
 
How to Overcome Tokophobia
Overcoming Tokophobia fear of childbirth is a personal yet achievable goal, especially with the right support. Here are some tokophobia treatment strategies to help you move forward:
1. Seek Professional Help
The guidance of a mental health professional or mental health provider is pivotal in managing this fear. Therapies such as Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) are highly effective. CBT helps women examine and reframe their anxiety symptoms, develop healthier coping mechanisms, and reduce their overwhelming fear about childbirth. Working with a mental health specialist ensures an individualized approach to healing.
2. Educate Yourself
Knowledge can greatly reduce childbirth fear. Attend prenatal classes to learn about labor, delivery options, and newborn care. These sessions address common areas of fear, such as labor pain or unexpected complications. Books and educational videos are also effective tools to demystify the birthing process.
3. Establish a Support System
A robust support group can make all the difference. Whether it’s a partner, family member, or fellow pregnant women, having people who listen to you without judgment eases your burden.
4. Create a Birth Plan
Work with healthcare professionals to develop a detailed birth plan that aligns with your comfort level. This can include personalized preferences for pain relief, delivery method, and the presence of supportive individuals during labor.
5. Explore Mind-Body Techniques
Yoga, meditation, and mindfulness are excellent ways to reduce tension and promote relaxation before childbirth. Techniques like hypnobirthing, which combines breathing exercises with guided imagery, can shift perceptions of birth, making it feel more manageable and even empowering.
6. Engage in Therapy After Traumatic Events
Women who have experienced secondary Tokophobia after a traumatic care event or birth may want to consider seeking help. Working through the trauma with a mental health provider specializing in diagnostic and statistical manual mental disorders, such as PTSD, will provide healing and closure, reducing the cycle of fear.
7. Lean on Medical Professionals
Your healthcare team, including doctors, midwives, or doulas, are crucial in helping manage Tokophobia. They understand the unique challenges women face and can offer personalized care options. Doulas, in particular, are excellent sources of physical and emotional support during labor.
8. Exercise Regularly
Gentle physical activity, like walking, swimming, or prenatal yoga, not only boosts mood through endorphins but also prepares your body for childbirth in a healthy and stress-free way.
9. Use Positive Affirmations
Replace fears with empowering thoughts like, “I trust my body,” or “I am capable.” These affirmations build confidence and reduce general anxiety over time.
10. Join Support Groups
Sharing experiences with other women who truly understand your fears can be comforting. Support groups remind you that you're not alone, offering a safe space to exchange stories and coping strategies.
 
Final Reflections
Tokophobia is a complex, deeply personal challenge, but it is not insurmountable. Understanding the causes of primary Tokophobia or why secondary Tokophobia occurs allows women to take intentional steps toward healing. With a mental health specialist's help, a solid support system, and actionable strategies, this intense fear can be overcome. No woman should suffer in silence—compassion and help are always available for those who reach out.
At Overcomers Counseling, we’re dedicated to empowering women to face their fears and live full, happy lives. If you or someone you know is struggling with the fear of childbirth, call us today at 719-345-2424 or visit us at OvercomeWithUs.com. Together, we can pave the way for a more confident and supported birthing experience.
You're not alone on this path—and with the right support, you can overcome it.

Welcome to another episode of the Colorado Counseling podcast, brought to you by Overcomers Counseling. Today's episode is all about "Developing Mental Training Exercises for Athletes".
Are you curious about how to develop mental toughness in sports for kids? Or perhaps you're wondering how you can support your child with sports anxiety? Well, you're in the right place! Our experts will delve into these topics and provide valuable insights to help you navigate these challenges.
In this episode, we'll be focusing on exercises for mental toughness for sports. We understand that physical strength alone isn't enough to excel in sports - mental resilience plays an equally important role. We've got a goldmine of information for you, as we explore practical ways to cultivate mental toughness in athletes.
We'll also touch on sports counseling in Colorado, and how it's helping athletes manage anxiety, perform better, and overall improve their mental game.
And for the parents listening in, we haven't forgotten about you! We'll share strategies on how to develop mental toughness in sports for kids and discuss ways you can help your child deal with sports anxiety.

We take a look into the world of mental exercises designed to help you navigate the challenging terrains of anxiety, depression, and grief. We've done our homework, evaluating the latest research and expert advice, so you can expect practical insights that can truly make a difference in your life.
We'll discuss positive thinking exercises for anxiety. These are strategies that can help you redirect your thought patterns towards a more constructive path. 
We'll also talk about Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT) exercises for anxiety. DBT is a form of cognitive-behavioral therapy that teaches skills to manage painful emotions and decrease conflict in relationships. Learn more about DBT exercises for anxiety.
We will explore therapy for grief. Losing someone you love is a profound experience, and it's crucial to understand how to process these emotions healthily. Find out more about our approach to grief therapy in Aurora Colorado.
If you're dealing with anxiety, depression, or grief, this episode promises to offer valuable insights and practical steps to help you on your journey to mental well-being. 
Manage Anxiety, Depression, and Grief
Mental health is just as important as physical health when it comes to overall well-being. Managing emotions like anxiety, depression, and grief can feel overwhelming, but mental exercises offer practical ways to improve mental health and find balance. These exercises serve as tools to help reduce stress, bring clarity, and regulate emotions, making them a valuable part of your daily routine.
Whether you're dealing with anxiety symptoms, negative thought patterns, or the weight of grief, incorporating mental exercises into your life can lead to significant improvements in emotional regulation and overall health.
The Benefits of Mental Exercises
Mental exercises for anxiety, depression, and grief go far beyond temporary relief. These practices stimulate emotional release, improve cognitive function, and reduce anxious thinking. They also help reframe negative thoughts, promoting a healthy way to approach challenges.
For example, mindfulness meditation encourages present-moment awareness, allowing you to focus on what you can control rather than ruminating on the past or worrying about the future. Techniques like progressive muscle relaxation help alleviate anxiety by easing tension in various muscle groups, promoting a sense of calm throughout the body.
With consistent practice, exercises designed to reduce stress can improve sleep, stabilize mood, and foster a more balanced life. Even simple acts like taking a brief walk or practicing deep breathing can significantly improve your mental state while offering physical health benefits.
Managing Anxiety with Mental Exercises
1. Breathing Exercises
Anxiety often feels overwhelming because of rapid breathing and racing thoughts. Breathing exercises help bring calm and focus back. One effective technique is the "4-7-8" method. Begin by taking a deep breath in through your nose for four seconds, holding it for seven seconds, and exhaling through your mouth for eight seconds. This slows your heart rate and reduces feelings of being anxious in just a few moments.
2. Progressive Muscle Relaxation (PMR)
PMR involves tensing and releasing various muscle groups to ease physical stress and anxiety. For instance, tense your shoulders for a few seconds, then release and focus on the feeling of relaxation. Repeat this process with other muscle groups to help your body feel less tense and your mind more at ease.
3. Visualization Techniques
Close your eyes and imagine a serene space, such as a peaceful meadow or a calming beach. Engage all your senses to make this space feel real, helping to reduce anxiety and refocus your mind. Visualization can also involve picturing yourself managing stress successfully, such as confidently speaking in a meeting or staying calm during a challenging moment.
4. Mindfulness Meditation
Mindfulness meditation centers your attention on the present moment and accepts it without judgment. Sit quietly and focus on your breath, noticing how it feels as it enters and leaves your body. Whenever your mind wanders, gently guide it back to your focus. Practicing mindfulness can interrupt anxious thoughts and cultivate a sense of calm.
Counteracting Depression Through Mental Exercises
1. Gratitude Journaling
Writing down things you're grateful for can shift your focus away from negative thoughts toward feelings of appreciation. For example, noting a kind word from a friend or a beautiful sunset you witnessed helps you build a more resilient and positive mindset.
2. Behavioral Activation
Depression often leads to withdrawing from activities, which makes it harder to feel joy. Behavioral activation involves taking small, manageable steps to re-engage with life. Whether it's cooking a favorite meal, spending time with a pet, or starting a new exercise program, these activities encourage emotional release and improve your mood.
3. Exercise and Physical Activity
Physical exercise is not only beneficial for physical health but also for mental health disorders like depression. Aerobic activities, such as jogging or cycling, release endorphins that can reduce symptoms of anxiety and depression while promoting a more balanced mood.
4. Self-Compassion Practices
Depression often fosters self-criticism. Practice self-compassion by treating yourself with the same kindness and understanding you'd offer a friend. Simple acts like repeating affirmations or acknowledging your emotions without judgment can help rebuild self-esteem and boost overall well-being.
Grief with Mental Exercises
1. Expressive Writing
Writing about your emotions helps process grief and find clarity during difficult times. Take just a few minutes each day to jot down your thoughts, memories, or reflections on your loved one. This act of self-expression can reduce emotional tension.
2. Art Therapy
Creativity can be a great tool for exploring and releasing complex emotions. Even if you’ve never picked up a paintbrush, activities like drawing, painting, or sculpting allow you to externalize feelings that words may not fully capture.
3. Guided Imagery
Visualizing a comforting space or reconnecting with treasured memories offers a sense of solace during grief. Picture a safe place where you feel at peace, or mentally revisit times when you felt close to the person you’ve lost. Guided imagery fosters hope and helps the healing process.
4. Creating a Memory Box
Gather meaningful items that remind you of your loved one, such as photos, letters, or keepsakes. By creating a memory box, you construct a tangible connection to their presence while providing a ritual for honoring their life.
Why Consistency Makes a Difference
Consistency is key when incorporating mental exercises into your routine. By dedicating just a few moments each day to practices like breathing exercises or mindfulness meditation, you'll strengthen emotional regulation and pave the way to a healthier mental state.
Tracking progress through a journal or reflecting on small wins can reinforce this habit. Though setbacks are normal, viewing these moments as opportunities to refocus rather than failures can help you stay on track. Remember, healing is a gradual process that requires patience and effort.
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Mental exercises are a simple yet effective way to manage stress, anxiety, depression, and grief. Whether you're practicing mindfulness meditation, taking a brief walk, or starting a new exercise routine, these tools allow you to nurture your mental well-being in a healthy way.
If you’re finding it difficult to cope, seeking professional support from a mental health professional can provide additional guidance and reassurance. Over time, these practices can significantly improve your emotional resilience, offering hope and stability even during life's most challenging moments.
Take a deep breath, make time for self-care, and remember that every small step you take is part of a greater journey toward healing and balance.

Welcome to the latest episode of the Colorado Counseling podcast - "Nature vs Nurture: Meaning, Examples, and More".
In this enlightening episode, we delve deep into the age-old debate of nature versus nurture. We explore how both genetic and environmental factors play crucial roles in shaping an individual's behavior, intelligence, and personality.
Our discussion begins with an exploration of the concept of 'nurturing intelligence from birth'.
You can find information on how to nurture a child's intelligence from birth, where we discuss practical strategies parents can use to foster their child's cognitive development from an early age.
What are some examples of consequences for bad behavior?
We talk about how nurture, in the form of parental discipline and guidance, can influence a child's actions and reactions to various situations.
It's important to underscore the importance of the family as a nurturing environment. Family is an integral part of the nature vs. nurture discussion.
This episode promises to be a thought-provoking journey through the intricate interplay of nature and nurture. So tune in, and let's unravel the complexities of human development together.

Listen to these simple and effective ways to calm anxiety in this episode of The Colorado Counseling Podcast. Learn how to harness the power of your senses with grounding techniques designed to bring you back to the present moment. Explore actionable tips to manage anxious thoughts and reconnect with a sense of calm.
 

In this episode, we're learning about the fascinating and often misunderstood form of therapy: Play Therapy.
Whether you're a parent seeking better ways to connect with your child, a teacher aiming to understand your students, or a fellow counselor interested in expanding your therapeutic toolbox, this episode is for you. Join us as we explore the history, theoretical foundations, and practical applications of play therapy. We'll demystify its process and shed light on how it can help children express themselves, understand their emotions, and work through their challenges, all through the universal language of play.
Play therapy is a form of psychotherapy that uses play, a child's natural mode of expression, to enable them to express their feelings and thoughts in a safe, supportive environment. This therapeutic approach, primarily used with children aged 3-12, provides an opportunity for children to 'play out' their thoughts, feelings, and problems just as adults use words to express themselves.
The idea behind this form of therapy is that play is the child's language, and toys are their words. From traditional toys to modern board games used in play therapy, a variety of tools can be utilized to facilitate communication and understanding.
We'll also look at how play therapy can address specific conditions. For instance, we'll discuss how play therapy can help a child with separation anxiety, providing strategies to manage their fears and build confidence.
Furthermore, we'll share some effective play therapy ideas for children with autism, highlighting how this approach can enhance communication, social skills, and emotional regulation.

Today we are talking about the world of online therapy in Colorado. We discuss how these virtual sessions follow the same structure as traditional therapy, with therapists guiding conversations, offering insights, and teaching coping strategies.
Listeners can expect to learn how the frequency and duration of these sessions can be tailored to individual needs and preferences, and how therapists monitor client progress and adjust treatment plans accordingly.
Whether you need online anxiety therapy in Boulder Colorado, or anywhere else in the state, we can help.
The episode further explores how online therapy eliminates geographical barriers, allowing clients to choose therapists who best fit their needs, regardless of location. This flexibility can be particularly beneficial for individuals seeking assistance with specific issues like anxiety or those requiring therapists with specialized training such as online Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT).
We discuss how accessing therapy from home could reduce the stigma associated with seeking mental health treatment.
This is particularly relevant for individuals dealing with conditions like ADHD, where the prospect of being seen entering a mental health clinic can be daunting.
This is also a great time to learn about navigating online ADHD medication management, emphasizing the anonymity and convenience online therapy provides. Tune in to gain a comprehensive understanding of the benefits and workings of online therapy.

The Colorado Counseling Podcast invites young listeners to explore the calming world of meditation! This episode, "Guided Meditation for Kids," offers a gentle introduction to mindfulness. Kids will discover simple techniques to quiet their minds, manage big feelings, and find inner peace. It's a fun, accessible way to learn how meditation can bring focus and relaxation into everyday life.